NEON REVIEW: CHOPPING MALL (1986)
Quintessential 80s slasher film teens lock themselves inside a high tech mall overnight patrolled by killer robots. What could go wrong?
'CHOPPING MALL' (1986) is tonight's viewing pleasure and a 'Vestron Video' classic with golden dialogue such as "I guess I'm just not used to being trapped in a mall in the middle of the night being chased by killer robots". Now fully restored on Blu Ray as part of a series of infamous Vestron horror greats (children of the 80s will appreciate that company), once again you can get locked in the most banal looking mall in America with eight horny teenage mall employees who have decided to chill in the bedding store overnight.
Problem is that it's patrolled by three lethal force security robots that look like giant weaponized Nintendo ROB robots. Never mind that it doesn't make sense that you'd actually use bulky death machines to keep an eye out for overnight break ins, just rejoice in teenagers played by actors in their late 20s attempting to dispatch them with vast amounts of military grade weapons and ammunition easily acquired at a sporting store, plus an exploding head or two. Keep an eye out for Dick Miller who got the rough end of a snow plow in Gremlins, who also gets an unfortunate run in with the Mall's pesky security team. And we do enjoy seeing Kelli Maroney kicking ass hot of the heels of (well, two years after) the equally trashy Night of The Comet (1984). Rest assured there is plenty of prerequisite gratuitous 80s slasher film boobs, butts and pecks from both sexes. Enjoy!
Directed by Jim Wynorski. Starring Kelli Maroney, Tony O'Dell and Russell Todd.
NEON REVIEW: COLOSSUS: THE FORBIN PROJECT (1970)
Before Skynet, there was another computerized defense nasty. Colossus is our underrated home viewing pick of the week
We get it. Sometimes you just can't make it out to the movies. So we'll be digging up some under appreciated gems that might be a rare find on streaming or strictly only on DVD. So in that case, we'll be presenting a weekly quick review for viewing suggestions...
COLOSSUS: THE FORBIN PROJECT (1970)
Before google... sorry...Skynet went self aware and destroyed us all in Terminator 2, there was another defence program getting bossy and deciding on what's best for mankind. Colossus is a very, very under appreciated sci fi classic, and warning on our blind faith in technology, full of great disposition over effects, effects, effects. In the near future, America has handed over it's control of arsenals and intelligence to 'Colossus' a massive unmanned artificial intelligence facility deep beneath the Colorado rockies, in an effort for peace by removing the unpredictable nature of man's decision making. While Washington pats itself on the back, the program begins learning at an unfathomable rate, soon learning of another facility in Russia, and wanting to unite with it.
Wishing to maintain dominance, Colossus threatens humanity with it's own nukes if they interfere, while informing the leaders of America and Russia that it has essentially handed them world peace at the cost of it's loyalty to the machine. Central to this is Colossus' creator who maintains a cat and mouse scenario or words and deception in an attempt to outsmart the gargantuan facility and it's machine brain. More or less shot entirely within bunkers and situation rooms, Colossus is swift (just over an hour and a half), and full of that light oddly placed hearted music in 70s movies when we should be getting a big threatening crescendo of sound. Good for those that liked the era of Silent Running, Omega Man and The Andromeda Strain sci-fi films. Via Netflix DVD. Not available on streaming.
Directed by Joseph Sargent. Starring: Eric Braeden, Susan Clark and Gordon Pinsent